“Our differences are far outweighed by the similarities of
our human experiences.” – Someone
It’s quotes like these that encourage me to share my
thoughts and my stories:
I didn’t care if it was my best friend or the 10-year-old I
found myself annoyed by. I wanted credit for what I had done. I found the words
rolling off my tongue before I realized my audacity.
“No, I cleaned up the Legos. Not them.”
She’s always so good to take me with a grain of salt. She
nodded and continued what she was doing. She’s my best friend.
I cleaned the house. I
spent hours cooking and cleaning, not them. The folded clothes and dusted
shelves were my doing. I didn’t even do a particularly good job but I had added
those miniscule items to my real and imaginary to-do list, then crossed them
off.
It was in the shallowest part of my breathing and meditation
class that I was still enough to hear my inner voice point out my triviality.
Where does that come from? Without and answer I sat still, waiting for the
peacemaker to rise. My tattered old shirt hung loose around my body. My pants
gave way to my thighs as they expanded against the uncomfortable chair. I sat.
I Breathed.
In the quiet darkness of my mind, the images of my actions and thoughts paraded past my warm red eyelids. The words came to me just as clear and
easy as I had hoped.
It’s okay to be like
everyone else. You are them.
But I’ve got to be
different, I argued. I’ve got to be
special. If I’m not special, what am I? What will I have to give?
Fear rushed through my veins, pumped by hurt and insecurity.
If I’m not special who will
care for me?
Breathe.
Fear surrendered to the surge of oxygen, the presence of
life. Peace took its place. I had been taught it, said it myself and preached
it, in that moment I realized I hadn’t been living it. These are the savory
parts of life I thank the God I know for patience and wisdom. Kindness and
mercy.
Progress has been made for sure. No less than my brother and
no greater than my friends. I am them.
Breathe it in.
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