First day of the rest of my life.

Someone recently told me that I had a fun life. I never really thought of it like that, but I guess I do. Poker game on a Monday night, drinks and dinner while watching the game on Tuesday. When I think about it, I certainly do try to make it fun but I don't always feel like I succeed. I try my best to stay positive about things but I have the tendency to get a little uptight; even bossy and controlling. It's gotten much better over the years as I've matured and decided to live for God.

I used to balance all the tension by smoking a lot of weed. I thought it was fun and I thought it did the best job at relaxing me and my nerves. Well, I still think it's pretty fun and funny enough, I'm a little hi right now. I don't smoke as much anymore though, I'm about to quit…really. Most people would say it's not godly. On the other hand, I have heard some people say Jesus smoked weed, "It's in the bible." a nice older lady said. I have read the bible cover to cover I can say that, at least in my NIV, those words never appear. If someone would like to point it out to me I'd gladly take a look. I honestly don't feel like a bad person for doing it.; nor do I feel the need to point my long, honey-brown finger at others who do.

I believe I have reached a point in my life where the only thing I should need to calm my nerves is Jesus. My current vices and childish ways have run their course and it's time to move forward. Recently I have come to a place where it's just me. I have friends, but no boyfriend or husband to depend on. No parents to tell me it's going to be ok or walk behind me to sweep up the messes that I have made. My brothers and sisters live hundreds of miles away and some I don't even know where they are. I have few possessions to keep me warm but everything happens for a reason. My current situation has helped me realize that it is finally time to put my faith to the test and really do better. Not just say it or think about it, but just do it. 

When I was a child I, talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 1 Corinthians 13:11

There is a time and a place for everything. I once read "If you want to go places you've never been, you've got to do things you've never done." that is what I intend to do. I plan to make the necessary adjustments to my everyday living that are going to take me where I want to go…to the top.

I came home from work this evening and decided to start this blog; I had been thinking about it for while. I don't know who would want to read it or why. I don't know who will follow or even stop to glance. I have always felt like I had a story to tell and I'm about to find out if anyone feels like they should listen.